06/28/2025
I wanted to share some Cultural Education about the significance of long hair to Indigenous boys and men, and I'm choosing to share this after a few incidents that left my son, Jaxx, feeling really upset and hurt.
My son Jaxx started growing his hair long about 5 years ago, and it currently reaches his lower back. Despite the top of his hair being long, we kept the sides and back neatly trimmed and shaved. Over the last month, while out in public, at both personal and work events, he was mistaken for a girl. This upset him deeply, but he politely responded to each incident by clarifying he was a boy. We've discussed this with Jaxx and we told him to use those instances to educate others, and I am incredibly proud of him for doing so. However, he is still a 9-year-old boy and his feelings were hurt.
I understand we exist in a society that says boys should have short hair and girls should have long hair, a society that says long hair is a symbol of femininity. But we grew up in a culture where hair is sacred, it connects you to your spirit, and there are traditions that dictate who should touch your hair, when you should cut your hair, and how you care for your hair. We grew up in a culture where some of the greatest warriors had beautiful long hair. We also grew up in a world where our ancestors were forced to cut their hair in an effort to assimilate us and to forcibly detach us from our culture.
My child made the choice to wear his hair long to honor his ancestors and to honor his own spirit. So when you see my child out and about with me, please don't assume he's a girl because he has long hair. Instead, I encourage you to seek him out and ask him about his long hair. He is very articulate about its meaning and his feelings, and he'd be happy to talk to you about it. He's an amazing, creative, and bright little boy... and like everyone else, he just wants to be acknowledged and accepted for who and what he is. Let's work together to create a more inclusive and accepting world where everyone can thrive and be proud of their heritage.
