04/01/2026
We believe food should never distract from your meetings.
As such, after a comprehensive internal review, several alignment sessions, and zero feedback from anyone who actually eats… we’ve made the strategic decision to discontinue all fresh catering services.
We’re proud to introduce our new Low-Impact Flavor Menu™ — designed to optimize focus, minimize enjoyment, and fully support your Q2 deliverables.
Our new menu items (for which we expect a tepid response):
• Deconstructed Boiled, Unseasoned Chicken
• Pasta (butter optional upon request, pending approval)
• Our Signature “Lettuce Pile” Salad (no dressing, for liability reasons)
• KPI Brownies (results not guaranteed)
This initiative represents a meaningful step forward in maximizing synergy, protecting bandwidth, and ensuring full organizational alignment across all taste-related touchpoints.
We appreciate your partnership as we continue to innovate in areas no one asked for.