15/09/2026
I want to start this post by saying the biggest thank you to everyone who has reached out, messages, called, even turned up at the door, offered help, therapy, services, to talk, for coffee, just a friend. You all have no idea how emotional its been to go through my last few posts and see an overwhelming amount of care and support, even from strangers. It has meant the world to me.
This will be my last mental health post for the time being. But this is a long one, and an important one - sorry!
We have become very good at talking about mental health. We share the graphics, we tell people to speak up, we tell people that there is no shame in struggling, that asking for help is brave, that mental illness is illness, and that nobody should have to suffer silently.
And I absolutely believe all of those things.
What I'm starting to realise is that we're still not quite comfortable with what happens when somebody actually does speak up and say they aren't ok.
Because since becoming more open about my mental health, I've already experienced my honesty changing the way I'm treated professionally, including a decision to stop placing regular orders with my bakery because there was concern about how much I had on my plate.
I completely understand the intended kindness behind wanting to reduce somebody's burden. But i must ask everyone to not mistake honesty for incapability. My mental health does not make me professionally incompetent.
Baking is actually one of the very few things that continues to bring me genuine joy. It gives me purpose, It gives my brain something tangible to focus on, It gives me a release. There are days when being inside my own head is completely exhausting, and disappearing into a process of sourdough actually provides me with an ability to focus and a respite from the exhaustion in my head.
It is also my sole job, my own career, that i have built from the ground, up. So less orders means more additional financial stress.
If vulnerability changes the way you see somebody's competence, then of course people learn to put the mask back on. If we make people feel like they only deserve our support when they are a perfect, happy version of themselves, what are we teaching them? That it is not safe to feel what we do? That our opportunities are now limited because we are struggling?
If support is available for the cheerful version of somebody but withdrawn while they're struggling, that isn't what support is supposed to mean.
If honesty about mental illness can cost somebody work, opportunities, trust, responsibility or income, then of course people stay silent.
We spend September sharing su***de-prevention graphics. And they all say;
-Speak up.
-Reach out.
-You don't have to suffer alone.
-It's okay not to be okay.
They are lovely words - But they mean absolutely nothing if when somebody finally says “Actually, I'm not okay,” we start treating them differently.
This post is not about a singular action, or issue, or comment - it is about stigma, it is about why people who are struggling don't speak up, it is to highlight that people change around us when we do, it is to prove that the stigma still exists, and it is a calling to understand why people with mental health illnesses do not feel comfortable speaking out.
So, if we're genuinely serious about breaking the stigma around mental health and su***de in 2026, we have to do better than encouraging people to speak.
We have to be able to hear what they say without punishing them for having said it. Because otherwise we haven't broken the stigma at all, we've just learnt the socially acceptable words for pretending we have.
And as a final note on this, I weighed up whether to keep my page purely bakery related or not. If I had multiple shops or chains or I was larger than I am - then I wouldn't have. But its my bakery, I'm the only baker and I value honesty above anything else. I tire of seeing the picture perfect fake accounts who only share perfection and success.
If my page has fewer followers or interactions but shows real life, real feelings and real people and it has the chance of someone reading a post, resonating with it and feeling even 1% less alone than they were, then i will absolutely take that ❤️
